Edition #055: Weapons [Guest Post]
I’m very sick, Alex
I watched Weapons (2025) with Maya Normousbutt. Read that five times fast, and then read the guest post below.
Fraught, fun, and fragmented, Weapons walks us through the aftermath of a town in peril from the perspective of several of its residents.
Weapons foregoes typical narrative progression for a less satisfying format: raising a question, and then just answering it. The ending is not so much earned but given, though it’s still an entirely worthwhile and innovative watch.
The film also veers surprisingly silly, and introduces us to a terrific new archetype, the Clown Hag, laying the groundwork for one of the greater Halloween costumes of 2025.
What’s the deal?
All the children from a single classroom disappear, except Alex. Their teacher, Justine, is a suspect. She follows Alex home and sees weird shit.
Later, Alex walks in on his parents forking.
Another parent, Archer uses doorbell cameras to watch the kids’ disappearance, and maps their running trajectory to Alex’s house. A drug dealer, James, burgles Alex’s house and accidentally finds the missing children in the basement.
Alex’s mysterious Aunt Gladys finally introduces herself as the big bad. We learn that she has enlisted Alex in helping her harvest life force from his classmates.
As Archer, Justine, and James converge on Alex’s house, he works on reversing the spell that Gladys put on his classmates. He manages it, and the seventeen sleeper agents in the basement chase Gladys for absolute minutes in a sequence of intense and uncanny cathartic violence.
It’s good to get some cardio in.
Guest post: Maya Normousbutt can’t stop thinking about...
…the humble potato peeler and making bacon out of Paul the cop’s face…
I watched Weapons in a UK cinema with Lior from Horrorshow last summer. We munched on delicious sweet and salty popcorn (new to me!) in a red-velvet draped theater that was more suited to a Pinter play than the arena seating of my local North American cineplex.
I was a fan of Barbarian, and Zach Cregger’s second feature felt just as protean and high concept, deftly arraying the plights of gun violence, drugs, bullying, dirty cops, and misogyny against single women upon a classroom of American children gone missing overnight.
After a few short hours, we surfaced into a benign summer night fully jolted by the movie’s deranged finale. We batted around Cregger’s not-unsubtle imagery, speculated on the profuse themes, and were surprised by how funny the movie was. The human-drone-strikes were gory and zany and Amy Madigan’s piquant Gladys could’ve easily turned up in Miami at a Golden Girls coffee klatch (she just won an Oscar!). Not to mention that a few dexterous WTFs from a square-jawed Josh Brolin go an awful long way...
Six months later, my partner, brother and I were eating rubbery homemade popcorn on the couch, unconvinced by the $19.99 stream. Weapons’ 128 minutes dragged on while its coordinated, heat-seeking structure collapsed under more scrutiny. I’d loved the propulsive camera work and casting choices but the re-watch came off like a live-action episode of The Simpsons…
Was Julia Gardner a human portmanteau of Mrs. Krabapple x Lisa Simpson? Was the unhoused, drug-addled James ala Otto the busdriver x Barney the town drunk? Was the bumbling, philandering cop Paul part of Chief Wiggum’s force? Was Josh Brolin guest-starring as himself - Josh Brolin, General Contractor? Certainly Marcus, the school principal wasn’t lame like Skinner, but just as ineffective in his post. And Cregger even sent in the clowns…
What was absurd and novel and thrilling in the UK now read familiar and a little underbaked - the movie’s tension sputtering into the catharsis of a Springfield-town-melee from the later seasons. (Which admittedly, is still wonderful in its own right.)
All this to say - both viewings felt true. A high octane movie is made for the big screen and watching it across the pond with the one and only Horrorshow Jane was an eventful lark. Plus we all know second viewings can be deflationary for obvious reasons, especially in this genre. But given the climate of demagoguery in America, the themes behind Weapons seemed misdialed in their gruesome charm, landing more as sign-posted parody than an effective horror allegory for our times.
The popcorn matters too.
- Maya Normousbutt for Horrorshow Jane
Maya Normousbutt has never been accused of making a prank call in the ‘90s, shoutout *67 (yes kids, the 6-7 before brainrot.) She is from Chicagoland and lives in Canada with her family. She is working on her first novel.
Want to guest post for Horrorshow Jane? Message me and we’ll collaborate on a movie together! I’d love to feature your thoughts and critiques.